PANTS LOCK |
How not to get into someone's pants online: put your best foot forward... and right into your mouth. These are real "hello" messages and chat transcripts from dating sites. Submit your own, or get updates on Twitter. |
Your myths and fables are inspiring. How I long to hear them from your lips. Do you ever turn them into songs?
I would write you a Lay, a verbal, sonic feast for your symmetric teeth. I know you are currently partnered, but could you use a bard or minstrel?
Tell you what: You can be my bard, as long as you follow me around all day, every day, playing the theme from “Shaft.” We can switch it up at the gym with the theme from “Rocky.”
